(Clearwisdom.net)
I began practicing Falun Gong at the end of 1998. I began with the mentality of listening to theory; however, after I listened to Teacher's "Lecture in Dalian", I wanted to cultivate myself. I practiced with the selfish hope of escaping the human world and therefore I did not treat myself as a practitioner. I behaved the same as an ordinary person in my daily life, so I had a big lesson to learn. I would like to share some of my cultivation experiences during these years.
In the beginning, I was extremely unsatisfied with life: I did not have a desirable job, nor had I found "love", and it felt painful. After a period of studying the Fa, I realized all of this was caused by my karma accumulated over many lifetimes, so I stopped thinking about them.
During a tribulation, whether you can think clearly or not, you must persist in Fa study. Only the Fa can remove the bad materials of human beings, and studying the Fa is eliminating these bad things. During my cultivation, sometimes I really wanted to watch TV, surf the internet, read novels, or go to sleep. If this continued for a period of time, I then would have symptoms of sickness karma, or trouble at work, so at that time I would eliminate the interference and concentrate on Fa study.
At all times, we must act according to Teacher's words; otherwise we will fall into the trap laid by the old forces, and bring ourselves unexpected ordeals. At one time I fell in love, but I did not treat myself as a practitioner, did not conduct myself according to Teacher's words, and did things that a practitioner should not do. As a result I had serious symptoms of sickness karma, caused a negative impact on people, and brought great difficulties into my life. In front of the huge emotional and physical ordeals, I despaired, cried bitterly and regretted. Teacher did not give up me, however, and through Fa study I gradually overcame this ordeal. I could not keep practicing without Teacher's mercy. If I could have realized that I was a practitioner, and behaved according to the requirements set forth in Zhuan Falun, I would not have brought such a big ordeal down upon myself.
If we can act according to Teacher's words, it can also eliminate problems orchestrated by the old forces. I explained the truth of Falun Gong to my colleague out of an attachment to thinking I was able to reach consummation without explaining the facts, and, as a result, the old forces took advantage of my loophole. My colleague viciously reported me, my workplace cadre spoke to me and ordered the colleague to threaten me: "If you do not write a repentance statement, you will be fired, sent to prison, and you will have no future work or life." I sent forth righteous thoughts, firmly refused to comply, but I was a bit moved. Through much contemplation, I recalled relevant Fa taught by Teacher saying that we should not cooperate with the evil's requirements at any time. I did not comply, and the matter was eventually dropped. If I had written a "repentance statement" at that time, what awaited me was surely persecution.
My attachment to fear was large because fellow practitioners at local truth-clarification material production sites were nearly all arrested, and as a result we lost contact with Minghui and had no materials. Some practitioners asked me to download the materials from Minghui. I was a bit scared, but felt I could not decline. Therefore, I went onto the website with some hesitation, and before I went on the website, each time I worried about whether the police would come, and whether the net police had found me. I unceasingly eliminated these negative thoughts, continuously studied the Fa, and slowly a large portion of my fear was removed.
When fellow practitioners and I had differing opinions, in the beginning I always thought I was correct. I made many comments on other practitioner's ideas, had many opinions about a fellow practitioner, and felt he did not practice well. Through continuous Fa study, these thoughts became less. I also tried to follow fellow practitioner's ideas, and the result was unexpectedly good.
When we calmly and earnestly study the Fa during a tribulation, we will know what to do, as Teacher has already answered the possible questions we would have in advance; the key is whether we can earnestly study the Fa. Once, on technical issues with computer processing, I pondered a problem for over a month with great difficulty, and could not find the solution. Afterwards I let go of the attachment, did not hold the thought that I had to fix it, and then all of a sudden I found the solution and felt Dafa gave me the wisdom. Only then did I remember Teacher had already talked about such an issue in a previous Fa lecture.
Only when we persist in Fa study, persist in solid practice and unceasingly melt into the Fa-rectification are we able to pass through this great tribulation and complete our real purpose for coming to this world.