(Clearwisdom.net) I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1998. I am writing this article to share my experience of how I broke through the attachment of fear and began to visit the Minghui website (Chinese version of Clearwisdom).

My Wish for Cultivation

For several years after the persecution started in China in 1999, I depended on fellow practitioners to deliver Master’s lectures and articles to me from the Minghui website. Back then, I wished that I could get online and read articles on Minghui by myself, but I knew that visiting the Minghui website could be very dangerous. Master said,

“Students in Mainland China actually have a much tougher time. Their materials production sites are basically at a household level, and they spring up everywhere. In other words, people walk their own paths.” ("Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005")

After reading Master’s words, I longed to read the articles on Minghui even more and hoped that I could set up a material production site at my house as well.

Later, I met a fellow practitioner who knew how to access Minghui. He took me to an Internet cafe. I felt nervous and excited at the same time. After seeing how easily he got onto the Minghui site, I realized that it was not as difficult, nor was it as scary to visit Minghui as I thought it would be. Afterwards, this practitioner and I made a few more trips to the Internet cafe. Since then, I have begun to connect to Minghui by myself, and I began to use the internet to validate the Fa.

Solid Cultivation

The first time I went to the Internet cafe by myself, I did not know how to turn the computer on. Back then, I knew very little about computers and was troubled by a strong attachment of fear; I dared not ask the assistant for help. I just sat there briefly and left. After going to a different Internet cafe, I still felt that it was too crowded and that everyone was staring at me. I took off again before long. After studying the Fa for two days at home and constantly strengthening my righteous thoughts, I finally went back to the Internet cafe. Eventually I successfully got onto the Minghui website with Master’s protection.

I knew very little about computers before. While I was learning computer skills, Master gave me more wisdom, so whenever I tried by myself with my heart in the right place, I would be able to do it. The most useful skill that I learned was downloading big files.

At first, it seemed that I was following the right procedure. However, when I opened up the Minghui website, I still did not feel very calm; I was concerned for my safety. Therefore, I sent forth righteous thoughts and told myself, “I’m a Dafa disciple, and offering salvation to sentient beings is my duty. I am doing the most righteous thing in the universe, and no evil factors are permitted to interfere and persecute me.” At the same time, I asked Master to strengthen my resolve. While downloading articles, the attachment of fear constantly bothered me, and it made me feel as if something bad would happen to me right away. If I did not send forth righteous thoughts, I knew that I would not be able to download the entire files. After downloading Shen Yun DVDs for the first time, I could not find any words to describe how excited I was. I remember saying to myself, “Thank you, Master!”

Before the Shen Yun DVD files were posted online for practitioners in China this year, the Minghui website published “The Different Methods to Download Files Safely.” I read that article several times and finally I decided on the one I would use. However, when I was downloading the files, fear constantly bothered me, and I felt as if I could not do it any longer. I took a few days off, studied the Fa, and repeatedly sent forth righteous thoughts. Master told us in "Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington D.C. International Fa Conference:"

"If a Dafa disciple's heart is unsteady, it will cause changes in his or her surroundings. When you have fear, for instance, you will find that the sentient beings around you are not quite right. When you change such that your presence is refreshing and uplifting to people, and your mind becomes broad and full of optimism, you will find the things around you to be correspondingly different. When clarifying the truth, when validating the Fa, and when encountering challenges as you do things, adjust yourself and look at things with righteous thoughts. It might just prove to be effective."

Eventually, with Master’s help, I successfully downloaded the Shen Yun DVD. I broke through the attachment of fear when I went from not daring to download big files to downloading them. After I leared the necessary computer skills, I changed from being scared to letting go of fear. Nonetheless, when occasionally the Internet did not work, or when the computer did not work well, I still had the thought that the computer had security issues. When I had that thought, I would send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the fear and any interference. After that, I would return to have a peaceful and calm mind. I would continue sending forth righteous thoughts, and very soon the problems would be resolved.

Our hearts should not be guided by fear, and we should undertake the tasks that are ours. However, when we do tasks for Dafa, we should maintain a righteous mentality; righteous thoughts come before righteous actions. As long as our xinxing is improved and our righteous thoughts strengthened, and as long as we use technology to carry out righteous actions, problems can be resolved. This is not reachable until we genuinely cultivate ourselves. Practitioners should do more Fa-study and genuinely study the Fa with a tranquil mind. If problems cannot be solved right away, we should not get stuck on the issue, but we should study the Fa with a peaceful mind. When we do that, Master will help us open up our wisdom.

The above is just my current understanding. Please point out anything inappropriate.