(Minghui.org) Time flies, and it has been slightly more than a year since I started making truth-clarifying phone calls on the Global Rescue Phone-Calling platform. During that time, I once again experienced how wonderful it felt when I improved in my cultivation. This included breaking through human notions, learning how to look within when I was disturbed, finding joy in hardships, and sensing the preciousness of the lives I was clarifying the truth to.
When I first joined the Global Rescue Phone-Calling platform, my greatest worry was lack of time. Apart from my off days, I work 8 hours a day at my job. It takes me an hour to get there and an hour to get home. I set a rule for myself that if there is nothing important I have to take care of, I will log onto the platform and make phone calls for two to three hours every night on workdays. As for off days, there is no limit. I try my best to make as many calls as possible.
In the past, I went to work after doing the exercises, came home after work, took a bath, washed clothes, did household chores, and made dinner before I went online to study the Fa with local practitioners. Then I practiced my instrument until midnight Beijing time, which is the time for sending forth righteous thoughts (Japan time 1 a.m.). I only slept four to six hours a night. If I were to make phone calls, my time would be even tighter and I also had to do it when it was convenient for people to answer.
After thinking it over with human notions, I adjusted my Fa study so that I studied one lecture in Zhuan Falun, the main book of Falun Dafa, with local practitioners and promised myself I’d study the other lectures on my own. However, a month later, I’d only studied a few pages of the other lectures because most of the time when I tried to study Fa by myself, I got sleepy. I was anxious about this incorrect state of mine.
One night in a dream, there was a long bench in the middle of a big yard. It was nighttime, and Master and a few male practitioners had just finished doing some work and were sitting on the bench to rest. When they saw me enter the yard, Master looked at me benevolently, and I felt great, as though I had been with Master every day. But when I looked around, the surroundings were unfamiliar. Just then, another practitioner whose face I couldn’t see clearly came and asked Master something. It seemed that he was looking for someone. Master said, “They are studying the Fa in that room.” Following what Master had said, I realized that there was a row of bungalows on my right. The lights inside were on, and the door of one of them was open. I looked inside and saw many practitioners, but they were not the local practitioners that I was familiar with. As I continued to look around, a male practitioner passed me—I only saw his shadow—and then I woke up.
I was shocked. What I saw in my dream was most likely the Global Rescue Phone-Calling Platform! Master was busy working with us, and in real life, that’s what I was doing. At that time, I had only recently joined the platform. Apart from rest days, I went onto the platform every night. Because I was not familiar with the rooms, I would look sometimes around when I entered the platform. I understood that Master was enlightening me: I could study the Fa with fellow international practitioners on the platform. The next day, at the end of the big group cultivation exchange session, I heard the practitioner-in-charge say, “Everyone can go and study the Fa!” I felt that this was definitely not a coincidence.
I put away my human notions and joined the Fa study group on the platform after sending righteous thoughts early in the morning. By the time I headed for bed, it was 3:30 a.m. After sleeping for three and a half hours, I went to work and did the exercises after I got home. Much to my surprise, the next day, I was full of energy. Then, human notions intruded: “I slept very little yesterday. Will I feel sleepy later?” When I had this thought, I immediately became alert and told myself, “By guaranteeing my Fa study and doing of the three things, I am cultivating myself well and putting what I learned in the Fa into practice. I am walking on the path towards becoming a God. A God will not have such notions. This human notion needs to be eliminated!”
Master said,
“Another is, a lot of our Dafa disciples are indeed quite tired, but on the other hand, they haven't taken Fa study and cultivation seriously. They've done lots and lots of things, but they haven't cultivated themselves, and so they'll feel fatigue, feel tired, and feel that it's hard. Actually, I've always told you that doing cultivation doesn't compromise your Dafa work, for sure. That's because doing the exercises is the most effective way to get rid of fatigue, it's the best way to quickly make your body recover.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Atlanta Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
By doing the exercises after work instead of before, I ran into a problem: I had no time to make dinner. However, I knew deep in my heart that we cannot let up in saving sentient beings. So, on my off days, I bought more food and prepared more ahead of time. I would make about three dishes and divide each one into three or four portions and freeze them. I did the same for rice, so now I did not need to prepare dinner when I came home. This would help save a lot of time. I got rid of the attachment to the taste of the food and to eating freshly-cooked food. I also got rid of the human notion that the nutrients in cooked vegetables will decrease after being stored for a few days. I used to be stubbornly attached to these notions in the past.
Half-a-year passed. Sometimes when I was studying the teachings with fellow practitioners online, I felt that there were some parts I did not understand properly. After logging off, I would re-read that part until I felt that I truly understood it. That meant I got even less sleep. Initially, I was very conflicted about whether I should sleep or do the exercises, and most of the time, I chose to sleep. Finally, one day, I went to do the exercises. That day, I felt that I could endure more hardship and expand my capacity more.
Master said,
“I just said that the principles of cultivators and those of ordinary people are opposite. Human beings believe that a life of comfort is a good thing, while Dafa disciples believe that having everything be easy is a bad thing when it comes to their improvement and that discomfort is conducive to improvement. (Applause) Have you managed to turn around your fundamental concepts?” (Teachings at the 2005 Conference in San Francisco)
“Why do Dafa disciples need to cultivate, pass tests, have strong righteous thoughts, and go through suffering? Only those things can be considered cultivation. In fact, cultivation is about coming here to suffer, not coming here to be protected in the human world. When one studies Dafa he will be protected, but cultivating Dafa also requires one to endure suffering.” (Teachings at the 2005 Conference in San Francisco)
During that time I broke through human notions and got rid of attachments. Apart from suffering hardships, I also discovered that I was also feeling a type of joy, a very simple and pure happiness. It felt as though I had cast off a layer of shell from around my human body and I had this true longing for my true self to present itself.
Just when I was thinking of expanding my capacity for cultivation, an opportunity came. At the end of June this year, a colleague who worked the early morning shift was hospitalized due to an illness, and someone was needed to pick up the slack. His eight hours were 3 a.m. to 11 a.m. Because this had happened so suddenly, there was no one available to take over for him. My superior asked me about it and I agreed to help out.
Therefore, my schedule at work changed and I would go to work after studying the Fa on the platform every day. The job that I took over temporarily required me to cooperate with my coworkers. The first few days, a supervisor worked with me. This supervisor was a good man. He not only had good character and abilities and great work experience, but he also understood the truth about Dafa. He knew that I did not sleep for the whole night and was not familiar with my new job. Even if I did not ask him for help, he always helped me with some parts of my job. Working with him was definitely a happy experience.
However, my work environment is also my cultivation environment, and the path of cultivation will not always be smooth-sailing. When the supervisor went on leave, someone else came to work with me. He also understood the truth about Dafa and was familiar with the work for both the day job and the night job. He started work two hours after I did. When he came in, he first sat down to drink a cup of coffee, ate something, and then slowly started to work. He was what people call a “slick fellow.” In the end, what happened was that he could not fulfill many of his responsibilities, and I had to help him out even though I was unfamiliar with the job. If I didn’t, the day shift would not be able to carry on from the night shift properly. I did not want to cause trouble for the day shift.
Initially, I was a bit anxious. The first day, I helped him with his work but I did not do so without resentment. In normal situations, I like to try to do things perfectly. Because I had to help him, I was not able to guarantee that what I did was perfect, so I was a little unhappy. The second day, we worked together again and his work ethic was the same. I thought of reminding him but I held back. Still, my heart was in turmoil: “How could somebody be like this?”
During normal times, when I see that there is any room for improvement in the office, I will remind myself that I am a cultivator and fill in the gaps quietly without seeking fame or gain. This time, however, I started to feel unbalanced in my heart so I decided not to help him anymore. In the end, he became very anxious but he did not come to me for help and I just pretended not to see it. Just then, another employee came over and said he could not manage his job, so could I come help him. Hearing someone say that to me made me all the more unwilling to help the “slick fellow.” I replied, “Since he (meaning the slick fellow) is so relaxed about doing his work, I won’t go help him.” In my heart, I was still thinking about how I wouldn’t let him manipulate me anymore so I definitely wouldn’t go help him! Without a word, this other employee looked at me and went over to help that fellow finish his work.
After this was all over, I felt very unhappy. This was not the unhappiness that normal people talk about. It was caused by the accumulation of bad and degenerated matter in my dimensional field. I realized that I was wrong to not help my coworker. I realized that, as a cultivator, there was a problem with my cultivation. I actually made enemies out of my two coworkers in that instant! My heart felt very conflicted. It didn’t make me happy not to help him. As a cultivator, what was the attachment that kept me from doing what was right? If a god was in my shoes, would he have behaved like I did? I was determined to dig deep into myself.
I realized that I did not have enough compassion. I also displayed the attachments of vying with others, looking down on others, and bearing grudges. I wanted to complain to that coworker that I had come all the way to work without any sleep—didn’t he know that? There was no way I would display any compassion.
Master said,
“Whenever you get into a conflict with others, I guarantee that it is because your attachment has surfaced and is quite obvious. If you don’t seize that moment and you stay bull-headed and argue your points, the process of your stubbornly arguing is none other than that attachment showing itself.” (Teachings at the Conference in the Western U.S.)
“But as Dafa disciples, you cultivate kindness, so you should be compassionate.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Washington DC Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
“Compassion comes from a person's cultivation, and it's not something that's acted out; it comes from deep inside, and it's not something done to show others. It's something that exists eternally, and it doesn't change with the passage of time or changes in circumstances.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Washington DC Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
I realized that, although this problem did not seem big on the surface, the loophole in my cultivation was big and my human attachments were big, too. I actually only cultivated myself on the surface instead of getting rid of my attachments and really assimilate to the universe’s nature of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. I was not reasonable and clear-minded when I ran into things, that was why I behaved like that.
Master said,
“True shan is what a cultivator attains in the process of cultivation and cultivating goodness, and this is a genuine shan that is achieved by cultivation. When you interact with sentient beings, it's not possible for you to display your successfully-cultivated divine side in full, since you still have a human side that has yet to complete cultivation. When required, you must be rational and clearheaded like a cultivator, allowing your responsibilities and righteous thoughts to direct you, and only then will your true shan be displayed. That is what's different about a cultivator and a divine being. And that is what compassion means--not some intentional display, show of human preference for this or that, or an instantiation of, "If you're good to me, then I will be shan toward you." It is offered unconditionally and has no thought of reward--it is fully for the sake of sentient beings.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IX)
Master’s Fa corrected my heart. I was clear about what I should do. I wanted to improve my cultivation through this matter and I wanted to cherish this chance that Master had arranged for me to improve my xinxing. I wanted to let my sense of responsibility and righteous thoughts govern my behavior in front of the sentient beings.
One day, I worked with that slick fellow again. Once again, his attitude about work was that he couldn’t have cared less. This time, however, I had changed. I helped him without his asking after I completed my own work. I gave up my 30-minute break to do more and do well the job that I had to do. That way, we managed to do our jobs well. This time, my heart was calm and steady as though the whole of me was tall and big! That day, the other fellow kept smiling and thanking me.
I worked that morning job for about six weeks. In the last week, I worked with this fellow every day and saw it as a good chance for me to improve my xinxing. At the same time, he also changed greatly. There were many times when he left after quietly doing the job I was supposed to do.
Just like what Master has said,
“If a Dafa disciple's heart is unsteady, it will cause changes in his or her surroundings. When you have fear, for instance, you will find that the sentient beings around you are not quite right. When you change such that your presence is refreshing and uplifting to people, and your mind becomes broad and full of optimism, you will find the things around you to be correspondingly different.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IX)
Once again, I experienced how a change in my heart changed the whole situation on my path of cultivation.
Half a year ago, I participated in other truth-clarifying projects and expanded my scope in clarifying the truth. Every individual signature we secured was like a window to the person’s soul. Through these signatures, we hear their sincere voices, and they really make me feel very emotional. These are people who have the desire deep down in their souls to believe in benevolence, righteousness, courtesy, wisdom, and faith, virtuous values that have been passed down through our Chinese culture over 5,000 years of civilization. However, this desire is often covered up by the lies that the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) has been instilling in the Chinese people since the start of its regime.
During the process of clarifying the truth, I can all the more feel just how precious people’s lives are. The little bit of hardship we suffer is really nothing more than an important element in the process of our cultivation. We should use that part of us that has already cultivated well to save sentient beings benevolently, as the power from that part of us is definitely great! Master wants every one of his disciples to do well on their path of cultivation and become kings. Therefore, we must cultivate ourselves well and display our benevolence when we clarify the truth.
Due to my limited cultivation level, kindly let me know if there is any room for improvement.