(Minghui.org) My resentment toward my husband lasted as long as our marriage – more than 30 years. Although I’ve practiced Falun Dafa for more than 20 years, I never really tried to eliminate my resentment and always looked outward.
When I was very angry with my husband, my heart sank. Sometimes I reflected on my cultivation and wondered why this was happening. Because of the persecution by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), my husband was also on edge. I knew I should appreciate him. However, I was filled with all kinds of complaints about him. Because he has a hot temper, we talked less and less. He was unhappy with me as well.
When other practitioners came to visit, my husband welcomed them with a smile and was very pleasant. After they left, he was like another person. If I asked what was wrong, he just ignored me. I was amazed by how quickly his demeanor changed. Every time this happened I went into the bedroom and closed the door. Sometimes, I slammed the door to show how angry I was.
Everyone who knows him says that he’s such a nice and easygoing man, nothing like what I described. Only I knew what I went through. The resentment I felt towards my husband was carefully “protected” and “nurtured” by me. I couldn’t understand why this was happening. I felt helpless and distressed.
When I produced copies of the Minghui calendar in the winter of 2020, three practitioners I knew. who also held resentment, experienced different degrees of sickness karma. This touched me a lot and I realized how terrible resentment was for cultivators.
During this period, I listened to a practitioner’s sharing about eliminating sickness karma on the Minghui website. One practitioner mentioned that two practitioners she knew were dragged away by the old forces because of their resentment. Hearing this, I began sweating! The room I rented had no heat. It was very cold, but I was covered in sweat!
I told myself, “It’s scary to hang onto resentment! It can cause a practitioner to lose their life! Practitioners are here to help Master rectify the Fa and save people. Without a physical body, how can we help Master! I need to get rid of my resentment! Master, help me eliminate it!” As I said this, I could feel this wish come from the depths of my soul—my true self.
Perhaps this pure thought conformed to the principles of Master’s Fa-rectification. As soon as this thought came out, my body and mind underwent a huge change. The pressure on my front and back disappeared. For years it felt like a stone pressed on top of my heart—the pain went away. I felt light from head to toe. I felt enveloped by a feeling of indescribable beauty, ease and freedom. I felt like I was in another world and enveloped by a powerful energy, full of joy! It was tranquility and peace from the inside out. At that moment, time seemed to stand still, and the light was radiant.
I turned around and looked at my husband, who was sitting at the table. In that instant he seemed to undergo tremendous changes as well. He smiled at me.
I was stunned for a few seconds. Then, I felt a rush of tremendous gratitude to Master. My heart was full of light! From that moment on, I was happy every day, no matter where I was or what I was doing. My husband changed. Every day he is cheerful and his tone of voice is now very calm and friendly. Moreover, he took the initiative to cook three meals a day, which gives me more time to prepare truth-clarifying materials. He’s also now helpful when I ask for a favor. This was unimaginable before.
I understand that all these changes came from Dafa, from Master’s compassion! Master let me experience living without resentment and no attachments. All I can do is to be more diligent to live up to Master’s expectation.
This is the second time I submitted an article to the Minghui website since I started cultivating. The practitioners around me encouraged me to write down my experience. I hope it can be helpful to those who had the same situation.